Work and Dolly update

As you all know, I am a Physician Assistant and have recently started my new job in the Emergency Department at the Mount Sinai Medical Center in Manhattan. That is a picture (albeit blurry) of Mount Sinai. It is beautiful. It is only a 10 minute walk from our apartment and is flanked on one side by Central Park. So, if I ever actually took a break I could walk over there and relax. So, here are the biggest differences between Mount Sinai and Virtua (my previous employer). First, Mount Sinai's shifts are 12 hours each but only 3 times a week. Virtua had 9 hour shifts and were usually 4-5 times a week. I like the idea of the 12 hour shifts, although they are exhausting! It is nice to be there only 3 days a week and have the other 4 days to myself. Here is the problem I am having though. I have a hard time walking away and eating lunch/dinner. At Virtua, if I didn't leave to take a break and get something to eat it wasn't as big of a deal because it was only a 9 hour shift. Now, with the 12 hours it is a bit much. For example, yesterday I had run out of my Kashi Go Lean Crunch cereal so I had an apple for breakfast. I then never took a break because...oh hell I don't know and therefore found myself in a cold sweat (probably due to my impending hypoglycemia) for the last 2 hours of my shift. So, okay...it's 9:00 time to leave right? No, again I have issues. I have ended up leaving 45 minutes after my shift each time so far because I am finishing up charts and what not. So then I walk home. It's funny, while I am in the ED I am running around and moving and grooving feeling good. As soon as I step outside I realize how bad I have to urinate because I haven't done so since the morning and my hypoglycemic coma starts to set it. When I get home I have to walk and feed Dolly though (because Steve still isn't home from work!) and then finally at 11 I sit down for some dinner. Now, this would be a great diet except after both shifts I have come home and scarfed some pizza near midnight. Oprah would not be very happy! The second thing that is different is that I can wear scrubs on night and weekend shifts only. I love scrubs. I have loved scrubs for years and even have my favorite pair of scrubs. I am heartbroken. And even worse, now I am forced to poke at butt puss and cut out ingrown toenails in my snazzy dress clothes. But I agree that it does look more professional. It's sad. I am looking forward to my weekend shifts so that I can wear my favorite pair of scrubs. Incase you are wondering they are a pair of navy blue bottoms with my green virtua top that I stole. But so far I love Mount Sinai. Everyone is really nice and happy to help when I look clueless when I don't know where the emesis basins are (which is something valuable to know if you don't want your shoes puked on). I was supposed to be on training/probation for 2 months but was informed yesterday (at the end of my second shift) that that period would be halved because I am so wonderful and people love me so much. haha....but seriously, that's what my boss said. Seriously...I'm awesome at my job.

Now, to the all important Dolly update. I will forgive anybody that just skipped the work update and came here first. Because she is SO CUTE! So, Dolly is continuing to adjust nicely to the city and into our family. She just recently made another trip to her country home (i.e. my parents house) while we went to a wedding. When we first adopted her we were told that she was horrible with other dogs. And probably for the first month and a half she would bark and go dog-shit (instead of ape-shit....anyone get it?) on each and every dog that we would pass. Which would be 5-10 dogs each walk! But then slowly but surely she stopped barking and starting sniffing. It's great now. Pretty much all dogs her size and smaller she sniffs and plays with and dogs that are larger than her she is starting to want to play with too. But almost no barking. I think that she just needed a stable home in which she doesn't feel threatened by other dogs. There is even a good friend of hers that we see each night, Charlie. Charlie is another Shih Tzu and they love each other. The only thing is that Charlie is a boy and he continuely front mounts her (if you catch what I'm throwing)! She doesn't get too upset, but I take personal offense for her. Does she look like that kind of a dog! My goodness, what will all the other dogs think. I am also finding more and more that when we walk her at night......she is afraid of shadows on the pavement. I don't know what it is but she does not enjoy walking on darker pavement. Another thing that she isn't thrilled about is the rain. Thunder and lightning doesn't bother her, but don't expect her to get her paws wet. Oh no! Apparently being front mounted is okay, but ask her to get her paws wet and how dare you! This was a problem because whenever it rained she would refuse to walk and we didn't want any messes in the house. So I went to our local pet shop, Furry Paws, and bought little booties for her to wear. They look like thick balloons and when you put them on her they look like boxing gloves because they are red.......but she loves them! She could walk all day in the rain with her booties on. So, while other dogs may laugh, she is just singing (well, barking) in the rain.

Awe, I love this picture. It was one of the first days that Steve started work and therefore wasn't around all day. First thing in the morning after I came out of the bathroom I found Dolly sitting on his Wall Street Journal. It was probably just because the last owner laid newspaper out for her to pee on, but I like to think that it was just Dolly missing Steve!

Looks like someone's got a case of the Mondays

My beloved vacation is over. I begin at Mount Sinai Monday morning. I was first offered the job back in April and after the painful, but necessary paperwork I was cleared Friday. Basically they do a huge background check to make sure that I am legit (little do they know I am actually to legit to quit) and I suppose I passed. The funny thing is they not so long ago said that I wouldn't be working until late September, but I received an email this past Friday at 5 telling me that I start on Monday at 8. Wow, I was not prepared for that one! I am excited though (super nervous, but excited) and working does come with this little benefit called a paycheck. Which will be necessary to buy such wonderful eye candy such as this..

If for some reason Mr. Louboutin is a fan of my blog and would like to send me a free pair, I would not mind that at all and would make sure to add a picture of me wearing them to the blog for continued advertising. haha

So anyway, it's back to saving lives on Monday...no wait, that's orientation. But Tuesday, definitely will be saving lives by Tuesday.

How cool is my brother?

http://www.rowan.edu/today/news/index/PR/2183

Subway Etiquette PSA

Attention all subway users....this is a public service announcement. I would like to list some subway etiquette for those of you who.....well, quite frankly need it! This is directed particularly those that are on the lines that I use and therefore directly affect my day. Now, I understand that if you have never used the subway before it can be quite overwhelming, and therefore this is a purely informational announcement. However, if things do not approve, and I have to address this again I will not be as pleasant!!

First, you know when you see those silver bars both vertically and horizontally placed strategically throughout the subway cars...yea, those are BARS FOR YOU TO HOLD ON TO! They aren't just for show, you can actually touch them and hold on. The benefit to doing so is that then when the subway starts and stops you don't fling your body into me. Which really helps everyone. Because then I don't have to check my ankle for your shoe marks and you don't have to see my death stare. If you cannot handle this, then you should sit.

Secondly, I don't care how crowded the subway cars are...don't touch me. In a city as bustling and crowded as NYC I still need my box of personal space. For example, when I am standing and appropriately holding onto one of the rails, do not touch my hand. And especially don't repeatedly do it or it will result in previously said death stare. And to go along with this, when you are standing so close to me that your hair is touching my hand (ew) it will be stuck in my ring! What do you expect.

Lastly, when everyone is standing to the side of the subway car waiting to board DO NOT push and jump in front of me. Are we not all trying to go to the same place? Of course we are, and odds are we are going to be standing right next to each other and you will have already ruined my trip. Death stare time....for your entire trip with me.

Proof

Child chain gang.......told you so!

Jobless in Manhattan

Okay, sorry for the lack of posts lately. For my loyal readers I know you have been missing me (mostly because you voice your complaints directly to me!). So, if you haven't heard I am still not working! I was offered the job in April, but am a prisoner t0 HR and paperwork. A realistic worst case scenario is that I won't start working until late September! Ridiculous! So, this has made me think of other jobs that I could get in the meantime because as much as I joke about my goal was to be a lady of leisure...I am kinda bored! So, here is what I came up with so far....

1. Starbucks Barista -
Reasons it would be cool : I love Starbucks, and I would especially love free coffee while I was working! Also, I would love to be able to write my Barista recommendations on the board each day.
Reasons it won't work : For the amount of money that I would be paid I don't know if I could deal with all the crazy people with drawling from caffeine with their 5 minute long order. (in rich white person voice...ah, yea...I'll have a grande skim 3 shot 140 degree sugar-free iced caramel macchiato...and a scone) I mean seriously, if you need to take a breath in the middle of your order...you are too freakin' controlling! So, I think somewhere in between rolling my eyes, sighing, and saying "huh" I would be fired. I'll be honest, when I order I do say...grande non-fat no-whip iced mocha, which may at first seem controlling (me...controlling...never!) but it is really just to save them the time of asking....do you want whip cream? It is just me trying to help my barista!

2. Dog walker -
Reasons it would be cool : Dogs are cute and you actually get paid $15 for a 20 minute walk per dog and you only have to go out of the house 3 times a day! Not too shabby. Plus you would have the added bonus of being about to check out other people's apartments without them being home. I wouldn't miss too much tv and yet feel like I was doing something.
Reasons it won't work : I have a hard enough time picking up my own dog's poo without sticking my finger in it. Therefore, I don't think that I would be able to walk multiple dogs at the same time. 'Nuff said.

3. Open a cupcake cafe -
Reasons it would be cool : I heart cupcake cafes, they are just so cute! My favorite is Crumb...check it out. What would be more fun then making yummy cupcakes and decorating them into little beautiful cups of sugar.
Reasons it won't work : Yea, I can't decorate cupcakes! Not helpful in this field of work. Who am I kidding.

4. TMZ reporter -
Reasons it would be cool : For those of you that are either over 40 or have a life and don't know what TMZ is, it is basically paparazzi following famous people. It was originally on the Internet only (http://www.tmz.com/) but is now a 30 minute TV show (on Fox...check it out!) and has paparazzi follow and videotape celebrities while asking them questions. I love celebrity following and asking questions, I would be perfect!
Reasons it won't work : You actually need to know where the celebrities are at, and I don't have those kind of connections...yet!

Any other ideas for me? Let me know.

Mrs. Naked Cowboy

Many of you probably know about the Naked Cowboy that plays his guitar in Times Square each day. He basically plays his guitar and people make circles around him just to get in a picture with him. Oh, and by the way, he has a number that you can call to make an appearance at your party --- 866-99-NAKED. So, if there are any birthday or graduation parties coming up, there is the number to have him come along! Well, here is something that might now know. A Mrs. Naked Cowboy exists! I know....scandalous! I found her while walking in Times Square minding my own business on the way to a Broadway show. (In the Heights...you may remember me ranting and raving about it earlier) We were walking around when I noticed a crowd standing around with their cameras pointed at something. I'll be honest, while many New Yorkers may walk right past something like this because it is very un-New Yorkerish to freak out over celebrities. But, I'm still a South Jersian and any opportunity that I have to take a picture of/see TomKat or Mary Kate Olsen I am going to check it out!! Well, it wasn't a celebrity, but definitely the second best thing......it was Mrs. Naked Cowboy!

How great is this! There are a lot of things about this picture that I love, but my absolute favorite is the wads of money stashed in her leg straps. She also sings. I will share with you, a little piece of her song...."Everyone's here......We're in Times Square...Takin' off my clothes". Oh, and the picture doesn't give you everything. Behind the guitar is a bra and black thong! Too much. You know what though, it is about time that women win once. You know what I'm talking about ladies. All the time in movies and on television there are beautiful women with ugly men. And when you go to the beach there are plenty of good looking women in tiny bathing suits, while the only men that wear speedos have a membership to AARP and are creepy tan and hairy. It is about time that women get a sumpin' sumpin' to look at!